My liver...

hurts.

I KNOW I've not posted in ages but I've been really busy. Really very busy.

Last Friday, I went to Gust night at Magdalen. The food was delicious, all 5 courses and the wine was plentiful. For part of dinner, I had a cock sitting next to me but after we swapped around for dessert, all was well. After dinner, we went to the MCR for mulled wine and I bumped into Chris the South African rugby player and Max, his hot friend I've been corresponding with on Facebook. It was good fun. Jamie, who I know from Caius is one of the MCR Social Secs. and we had a good long chat about how superior Oxford is to Cambridge. After the MCR, some guy from New College MCR we'd been chatting to suggested to go to the Bop there so we did. We're such sheep when alcohol is involved. At the Bop I chatted to random people, stumbled down some stairs bonded with some random American chick who lives opposite me(!) and then went to New College MCR (the ugliest MCR I've been in). That was good fun too.

Finally staggered back home around 4 and looked at my phone when I got up. Noticed I had dialled a number I didn't recognise and texted it saying "Hullo, who are you?". The person replied with their name and asked who I am. Anyway, 8 text messages later, we were having coffee at QI...he turned out to be very pleasant but I was slightly put off as he went to have a shit during our chat. Catastrophic situation.

On Saturday, Mark was in town and Annie, Allyn, Alice, another Mark and I went out on the town. It was pleasant but terribly, terribly alcoholic.

It was the German's birthday on Friday so we went to The Duke for cocktails, dinner at Branca and then cake at the house. Saturday, we were inundated with Germans and assorted non-native speakers of English,, most of whom were catastrophically rude and lacked social skills to am ost alarming degree. Disaster.

On Sunday, I went to the carol service at Magdalen with Barnaby and James and then to Pizza Express for dinner then back to Magdalen MCR for a drink.

This morning, I did something to my back whilst Russian rowing and I am going to sue my boatclub like the good North American I am.

Currently listening to Untouchable by Rialto

The new Harry Potter film isn't as good as previous ones. Snape and McGonagall have the best lines in the book but in the film they get nothing. NOTHING. Potter is an annoying little shit and Ron is incredibly wet and should be made to stop saying "git" and "hell". fucking cock. Dumbledore's accent occilates between Oirish, English and American and he's not the loveable, wooly headed wizard he is in the books. Not he just comes across as a paedophile. Yuck.

Q- What comes in a posh box?

A- David Beckham.

I laughed for days.

Now listening to: Just Can't Get Enough by Nouvelle Vague

'Friday' is the most beautiful...

word in the English language.

Well, it feels like it this week.

Had the most tedious meeting this morning with some very provincial people. I mean, have these people been to school?

Once again, it's happened...

A likes B
B likes C
C doesn't like B
B won't even look at anyone else but C.
and D just smells.

Catastrophic situation.

Currently listening to: Mr Burton by Amateur Transplants

Will someone in Washington DC please headhunt me? PLEASE?


I'm addicted to this stuff. I've been drinking it like water.

I am not as cruel as Max. Who is teasing one of my great friends mercilessly.

I am not as raunchy as MarketM. Who would like to get raunchy with me. But I keep saying 'no'.

I also don't have time to post or complete those ridiculous quizzes of which they are so fond.

This takes up all my waking hours.

Yet another black tie dinner to attend this evening. Everyone wants a piece of me. That's what comes of being a charming, amusing, attractive guest.

Now listening to: All I Need Is A Miracle by Mike and the Mechanics

The Divine Host...

Is of course, me. But Jenny is a close second. Dinner at St John's was a fun affair. Lots of booze, good company in the form of St John's and Merton MCRs. Drinks in the MCR followed by dinner in Hall with pleny of booze then back to the MCR for dessert, port and Bailey's. It doesn't get much better.

This evening, is mulled wine and home-made (of course) mince pies at my place.

Currently listening to Beef Jerky by Cibo Matto

Barnaby REFUSED to smell my pits yesterday. I keep telling him I'm very clean and NEVER smell. Ask anyone, I urged him...

I thought the Japanese were supposed ot be demure and defferential? Not the ones at the King's Arms who were bellowing across the pub. Obviously the evil half pint of cider at work.

Term is almost over. Another 3 days and it will be 9th Week. Where has Michaelmas gone? Where has the year gone? Who knows? I just wish everything would slow down a bit.

Max is a bad man. I introduced him to the person he is mocking. Of course I fully support said mockage.

Now listening to: Milkshake by Kellis

This afternoon, I returned the little black dress I've worn on several memorable nights. The bint asked if anything was wrong with it. I replied "there isn't enough room in the crotch area". She just looked at me and said "wot?". Anyway, that's £50 I didn't think I'd see again.