Kinky pervert...
Making someone call me 'Daddy' whilst I urinate on them doesn't make me a perv.
I (and several friends) got a free meal out of it and I found the whole situation strangely erotic. There's no accounting for taste. I mean, I KNOW urine is sterile (even if many Oxford medical students don't) but I certainly don't want to make someone kneel in the bathtub whilst wearing a complimentary British Airways eyemask and beg Daddy to punish him because he's been playing with himself. Oh no...not me. Not that I've ever been in that situation, of course...still, there is that free meal to think of...and an academic salary doesn't go far. I'm just saying...
So, after the imaginary incident above took place, I skipped off to the Tingewick Garden Party at Green College. It was pleasant enough but would have been more so if a certain short, balding (blonde highlights only call attention to the problem, not hide it) with lesions around the lips (labia?) medic hasn't been there. Things didn't really kick off until Phil and Morven (almost 30 minutes late) arrived. James M was also there as was Phil's ginger friend Hamish who looks better in photographs but is very pleasant. And he likes his dairy products. Kurds and whey. Did you see what I did there? He's courting an Iraqi woman....Iraqi, Kurd...no? Fuck off.
After quaffing lots of fizzy stuff and downing scones and clotted cream (and the odd wasp) we took ourselves off to Pizza Express at the Castle Prison place. I could eat at Pizza Express everyday. Infact I did go through a phase of eating there everyday for 10 days in Cambridge. After the 6th day, they threw in the dough balls for free. On the 7th day they offered a free glass of wine and on the 10th day, the waiter gave me his number...
Phil, as usual, disgraced himself and us by stuffing his trousers with paper towels in the loo. I mean, I went along with it but there was hardly room for one folded up paper towel in my pants but Phil managed several dozen.
After dinner, we went to The Living Room (I was expecting it to be full of chavs) and do you know, it was full of chavs. But in a pleasant way. James M and I had a good long chat and met some lovely townies.
Currently listening to: 'Snippets' by Amateur Transplants. Hilarious.
I (and several friends) got a free meal out of it and I found the whole situation strangely erotic. There's no accounting for taste. I mean, I KNOW urine is sterile (even if many Oxford medical students don't) but I certainly don't want to make someone kneel in the bathtub whilst wearing a complimentary British Airways eyemask and beg Daddy to punish him because he's been playing with himself. Oh no...not me. Not that I've ever been in that situation, of course...still, there is that free meal to think of...and an academic salary doesn't go far. I'm just saying...
So, after the imaginary incident above took place, I skipped off to the Tingewick Garden Party at Green College. It was pleasant enough but would have been more so if a certain short, balding (blonde highlights only call attention to the problem, not hide it) with lesions around the lips (labia?) medic hasn't been there. Things didn't really kick off until Phil and Morven (almost 30 minutes late) arrived. James M was also there as was Phil's ginger friend Hamish who looks better in photographs but is very pleasant. And he likes his dairy products. Kurds and whey. Did you see what I did there? He's courting an Iraqi woman....Iraqi, Kurd...no? Fuck off.
After quaffing lots of fizzy stuff and downing scones and clotted cream (and the odd wasp) we took ourselves off to Pizza Express at the Castle Prison place. I could eat at Pizza Express everyday. Infact I did go through a phase of eating there everyday for 10 days in Cambridge. After the 6th day, they threw in the dough balls for free. On the 7th day they offered a free glass of wine and on the 10th day, the waiter gave me his number...
Phil, as usual, disgraced himself and us by stuffing his trousers with paper towels in the loo. I mean, I went along with it but there was hardly room for one folded up paper towel in my pants but Phil managed several dozen.
After dinner, we went to The Living Room (I was expecting it to be full of chavs) and do you know, it was full of chavs. But in a pleasant way. James M and I had a good long chat and met some lovely townies.
Currently listening to: 'Snippets' by Amateur Transplants. Hilarious.
posted by OrlandoCatastrophic at Monday, August 14, 2006
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home