Ash Wednesday...

I'm wearing horizontal stripes today. I can get away with them as I am svelte. Slender. Slim...I could go on...


I had a delicious warm sandwich from Alpha Bar in the Covered Market today. It had olive tapenade, marinated and grilled tofu and tomato salsa on rye spelte. It was delicious. It also cost around £10 but it was worth it.

It may actually have only cost £2.95 but I am prone to exaggeration.

I really, really miss http://www.unicen.cam.ac.uk/catering/ul.html
I has the best Battenberg cake in Cambridge. And not just anaemic little slivers but f uck-off huge chunks. They used to employ a lot of people with Downs Syndrome and juveniles in the Tea Room as part of a make-work/welfare initiative. The Downs Syndrome workers would always be training the gormless Fen-bred locals on cash register usage. It was hilarious. One of the people they employed had Tourette's and it was great fun guessing if you were going to be told to 'f uck off' or not when you got your change back.

Some of the juveniles tried that on me but I got them sacked. F ucking pikies.

Currently listening to: Allegri's Miserere Mei (It IS Ash Wednesday).

This morning, I caught the crazy Belgian's even crazier sister's gormless boyfriend jerking off under the duvet in the living-room. I'm not judging him. I mean, we've all done it, right? I just didn't get caught...loser.

Some bint said I was vitriolic. Shocking.